Ok I don’t need to talk to the men today. As men we all feel the same way about V Day, we all want to go out of our way to show our significant other how much we love her and crave her poonanny on a regular basis. We all want this day to be kinkier than normal and we
would like to achieve this without spending a small fortunate if we spend any money at all. However, we also know this is impossible due to the high expectations women set for the day that are impossible to accomplish.
So allow me to talk to the women for a moment. Listen you get so many holidays a year where you are to be treated like a princess and your BF or husband is a distant cousin on these days. Hell there is even this big day called a wedding day where some lucky women get roses
thrown at their feet and become like Eddie Murphy's bride to be in Coming To America. We get it, you all want to be princesses and yes in this day of male sensitivity we all want you feel as if you are royalty, sometimes even more than you ever imagined. Which of course will scare you, but I digress.
Here is my solution, give Valentine's Day to the men. On this day of chocolates, blue balls, and light wallets allow the men to be thanked for all the moodiness days he has to put up with, the headaches you have gotten over the last year, the 12 times you got PMS. Let Valentine's Day be "Male is a King Day." Give him everything he has ever wanted, and become his personal slave for a day.
Think about this! You are women! You know your vagina is the most powerful weapon in the whole world. Why not use it on a day where men are so highly pressured to be the perfect mate and give him a taste of reverse psychology. Pick up the tab, open his doors, buy him flowers, feed him chocolates, massage him with your body, have a whole day where he can blow his load in the first 30 seconds of sex as many times as he wants.
It's quite brilliant actually; because honestly when a man feels like a king, especially on a day where he is extra sensitive and privy to being the most chivalrous, he always rewards his woman double sometimes triple then what she just delivered. Ahh the Power of the Poonanny!
It's like the male orgasm vs. the female orgasm. All men need is some titties bouncing on his face or good stroke of his thigh and he is ready to go like a stallion at the Kentucky Derby. However, women need to be warmed up, teased, tortured even into thinking they are never going to feel your ungodly manhood thrusted upon their Va-Jay-Jay.
So come on girls you are not 12 anymore, you don't have to sit around school all day waiting for a candy gram from that boy you love 4 eva and eva. You are a woman and you want to be a princess everyday not just Valentine's Day. So sacrifice your body and surprise your man at
work and allow him to fuck you in the pooper for once in his stationary closet while on lunch hour.
Trust me you will have the best wedding day ever if you can use V Day to your advantage. So from now on we as adults of the United States will never celebrate Valentine's Day again. From this day forward I propose that February 14th shall now be called Vagina Day! A day where men can have Vagina all day without having to wine and dine his significant other and rev up her poonanny!
You know its worth it ladies!