Saturday, October 27, 2007
Okay, I don't know if this is actually cool right now but it should be. This dude rides down our street with a T-Top sumthin, mullet and American flag waving and he is not kidding. Oh to be so oblivious, carefree and proud of your country. These colors don't run! Sorry, anyway ummm I want to get a T-top immediately before everyone else starts snatching them up because its coming. I feel a T-top frenzy coming on like the clap and it hurts so good! Ladies, don't sleep because these cars are no longer just for dudes and not just for you to spread your legs on the hood. You need to be behind the wheel with the air from the T-top whistling through your ta-tas. It's on.
No seriously, I like butts but sometimes don't you think, "Why?". Poop comes out of there! Someone else's shit comes out of there and its stinky and they might even have skidmarks right now as he/she is walking down the street! We don't even wanna talk about hemorrhoids and dingle berries all up in the butt hairs. These are all possibilities if someone does not shower DAILY. What percentage of the population do you think showers daily? Well, I tried to look it up for you and couldn't find anything but I think its like 2% or something. And... a healthy person has 2 to 3 good shits everyday so the chick in the baby phats right there just unleashed a big daddy in the can a few minutes ago. Think about it.
L and F: When did you get started with SG and why?
Lolo: When I was 16 I saw SG in a magazine in the UK and really wanted to be a member, but obviously I was underage so had to wait. As soon as I turned 18 I decided being a SuicideGirl was for me, so I applied and... Ta da! I guess I just wanted to be part of a society of amazing, powerful, gorgeous women, and I love every minute of it.
L and F: What's the best part about being a Suicide girl?
Lolo: Meeting other SuicideGirls for sure. Every one I have met through the site is so wonderful and it is such a pleasure to be able to call myself one of them.
L and F: Are there any fights amongst the girls? Is it pretty competitive?
Lolo: From my point of view it's not competitive, and I haven't experienced any bitchiness. Obviously there are more famous girls than others, but that's just part of the territory.
L and F: What is the biggest misconception about SG?
Lolo: That we are all bitches! For some reason people that think if they message an SG and she doesn't reply, she's a bitch... But it's just a simple case of some girls get a lot of messages or comments, and we can't reply to them all. It is a shame, but personally, I read everything and everything makes me smile!
L and F: When you're not doing SG, what consumes your time?
Lolo: When I am not doing SG there are millions of things I love to do. I am just a normal girl who goes to work, goes home, sees her boyfriend, takes pictures, smokes, drinks, sees her friends, spends time with her family, oh, and of course, plays World of Warcraft! ;)
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
....now this leads us into the next post....
Dear Lady Chavez,
So I was hanging out with some of my friends a while back and one of
my friends who is gay had these two girls begging to sleep with him.
First they begged to make out with him. Then the one pleaded to have
sex with him and even offered up her friend's pussy as an extra
incentive. Now I understand that they were strippers, not respectable
ladies like yourself LC, but what the fuck? Did these girls think
they were so hot that they could turn a gay man straight? Or is this
how girls usually act with their gay dude friends? Are girls ever
like, "hmmm, I wonder how my pussy is tasting today... oh I know, I'll
just go sit on my homo friends face and ask him." Because that would
be fucked up and I'd totally have to change my strategy with the
ladies. I normally walk around trying to spread the message of "I
love pussy" like Flav tries to spread the message of what fucking time
it is. I literally walk around with a giant pocket pussy hanging from
a chain around my neck. (I've never considered that this might have
something to do with why I can't pick up women.) Anyhow, if girls are
always flashing their tits and rubbing all up on their gay friends,
then I'm gonna turn my pocket pussy chain in for a t-shirt that reads
"Punani is gross... ewww!!!! I'm really gay. Really, let me taste
your pussy and I'll prove it."
p.s. sorry for the gratuitous use of "pussy"
Eternally horny and potentially homo,
Wow, I am so sorry that you were a total heart throb in Tiger Beat and now you're just beating it, watching gay dudes take the ladies. So you're hating on the gay dude phenomenon? I don't blame you because its something that needs to end.
Please stop trying to "turn" homos straight. They don't care if it smells fresh or if your vag looks like a butthole with just some extra skin. They don't want it! They are homo for a reason....because girls are annoying, clingy, dramatic cunts who think everyone wants to do them.
Don't hate the playa', you must become one. Don't switch teams but become less available. If you're out at da club with some ladies and your homo friends, chat it up with the dudes and some other ladies and don't buy them any dranks until they're lap dancing you in desparation. A girl only hits on gay dudes because they're the ultimate challenge and if she gets dissed its only because they're gay (not because she is straight amateur in the sack or that she smells like a fish fry). So, play it cool, Scott and please do not invest in any pocket pussy medallions. Thanks!
Monday, October 22, 2007
Yo Majesty comes straight out of Tampa with raw lyrics and live shows that might make you blush at first but then make you wish you could keep it that real. Shunda granted us some answers to the questions you all want to know about the finest, proudest ladies from the South. They've got the banginest bangers to make you bounce.
L and F: Yo Majesty has been making its mark everywhere recently, not just in the hip hop circuit but where music is concerned in general. How does it feel to be so well received by fans of all genres?
Yo: Its ah blessin from the Lord to have da love dat we have...it's out of the ordinary kinda love! Dats wassup...
L and F: We haven't had the pleasure of seeing a live show. Can you describe what your shows are like? It looks like there are some boobies involved. Give us the scoop.
Yo: Its not about boobies. Its about da way the music makes the people feel. They say it makes them feel free, its a refreshin...its out of the ordinary; they say dat they've been waitin on dis for a long ass time!!!
L and F: Your lyrics have been well received in part because they are ruthless and uninhibited. Do you girls really live the life your lyrics would suggest?
Yo: People appreciate our realness. If we weren't walkin da walk dat we talk about, dat'll make us some fake ass bitches. Do you think we're fake???
L and F: You have been compared to groups like J.J. Fad and Salt-N-Pepa. Do you find this to be a compliment or do you try to stay away from being pigeonholed?
Yo: People are free to speak there opinions. We stepped into the game legends before the whole world will get to know who we are. But, on the real, you can call me Shunda and her Jwl.B.
L and F: What can we expect more and/or less of from Yo Majesty moving forward?
Yo: You can expect more truth and less bullshit when it comes to Yo Majesty concernin the industry period!!! We came to conquer...
L and F: When you girls get super big, are you gonna become media whores driving around all drunk and showing your privates like some celebrities we know?
Yo: We already super big. Dis supastar shit is over-rated. I told you, more truth and less bullshit!!!
Check them out... the one and only Yo Majesty
But lets take a step back and look at whats happened in hip hop latey for a second. We've got Oprah putting on a conference with Common, Rev. Ben Chavis, Kevin Liles, and Russell Simmons to discuss the state of hip hop due to what happened with Don Imus. Before that, Nas struck with "Hip Hop Is Dead" last year; which prompted every fucking interview I read to ask the artist if hip hop is dead. If you have to ask, then its dead to you is how I feel. And also, there was other things going on. Such as Cam'ron on 60 minutes with Anderson Cooper saying that he'd stay silent and not be a snitch; stating that it is a code of ethics that come into play from his background. And the whole 50 Cent vs. Kanye thing which kind of set them as having roles in the hip hop game being Kanye as the "concious" type and 50 being "gangsta". Which doesn't matter who was who because they each walked away with a shitload of money that most of will never see in our lifetime. And lets not forget the NAACP trying to bury then N-Word which didn't have much of an affect as far as I know. I bet I know someone who went to the N-word and soon as I saw them I heard "nigga please" or "whats my nigga?". Sorry, I was being sarcastic but you know what I mean. At least they tried.
So, what do all those things have in common? Controversy. Its keeping hip hop alive in a way that people do not see. At this point, hip hop is being asked to take responsiblity for certain things that are being put on the public for people to hear.And furthrmore, people keep talking about how they want more of a message in hip hop so, therefore, maybe Nas has a message within this album that the hip hop audience can grasp. Nas naming his album "Nigger" is a double-edged sword. On the good end of the spectrum, that album could raise more awareness of our language in hip hop music; as well as tackle issues that our black communities would like to neglect. The bad comes in where you have the majority of who buy albums, who are surburban caucasians, taking a title like this and running with the word in order to make it seem like its ok to say nigger. Not like it hasn't been happening already but a reinforcement of this amongst a bunch of dumb-ass wanna be 8 Mile assholes could happen. Just having that word in forefront would either make people turn to it or turn away from it. Either way, its gets that attention with the shock value, even if it is done without that sole intention.
And another to consider is that he could be following the footsteps of Dick Gregory's "Nigger: An Autobiography". If thats the case, then my homie K-Beta already beat Mr. Nasir Jones to the punch (http://cdbaby.com/cd/kbeta); which is an album people need to hear. Regardless of what people may think of this move, its a good challenge for hip hop because its probably the most blunt and straight forward genre of music out there. And with messages that artists can encode in their music, there's not telling what people will be able to grasp from what they say in the near future. With an album titled like that, it might be worth a listen since the title has a deeper meaning behind. Never what you'll expect.
Listening to music to corrupt my brain,
Anyhoo, I digress. If I owned a restaurant I would sell a ton of booze and make it B.Y.O.P – bring your own porno. Now THAT’s an interesting concept.
Just a thought,
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Ok boys and girls. We're moving to a different format. Instead of updating the blog once a week, we're gonna be putting the new new shit up pretty much every day. There will be about the same amount of posts, just spread out. We have daily brilliant ideas that we lose because we don't throw them up right away. So, come back everyday and leave some damn comments people! We know we're always right about everything so there are no negative posts but let us know that you're feelin' us. It's an interactive type situation friends. Love ya!
Lady Chavez and Fluffgirl
.....Oh and we have some really cool side stuff going on that you'll know about soon...