Sunday, September 23, 2007

Plastic Little Doing Big Things

Plastic Little comes from Philly but is at every party from NY to England makin' you wanna go halves on a baby. They'll seduce you with their come hither lyrics and urban bad boy good looks. Just ask them to holler without all the driz...

L and F:
I mean, is this like a constant frat party? It sounds like you guys have a lot of fun.
PL: We have fun, but we definitely wouldn't have fun at a frat party. If you say frat party, i think of young WASP motherfuckers in rugby polos and dirty white baseball hats dropping pills into girl's drinks then complaining about the democrats are ruining the country. Yuckies.

L and F: We are huge fans of hip hop so we're sitting there listening and you guys are like really talented poets with nasty ass mouths. Job well done, who are your influences?
PL: Hmm... Lil Wayne, Yellow Man, Ghostface, 3-6 Mafia, Jigga Jay-Z, Andre Nickatina, Abner Jay, dranking, sex, and dranking some 'mo!

L and F: Tell us about your new album, "She's Mature"
PL: She's Mature is a roller coaster ride into the dark depths of sex, partying, and fantasy. It's some real absurd shit if you think about it. When we were making it we never thought of the vast contradictions that would come about from making harry Potter references on the same as gun violence inferenes. We just like what we like and we never try to reconcile the contradictions on the album. Life is full of hella contradiction. Most folks like to look at a picture of Talib Kweli and think to themselves "Oh, he's the good guy rapper." Then they look at a picture of 50Cent or whomever and say "He's one bad nigga." But real life isnt that simple all the time, It'll present you with some crazy scenarios in which you'll have do bad shit to come out on top sometimes.

L and F: You guys are from Philly and most people I know have a serious love/hate relationship with that place. What are your thoughts and where can we find you out and about in Philly?
PL: Philly. Cheap rent, getting a bit pricey though. Lot's of super talented folks here, lot's of shitty folks as well. Not many good jobs here for young creative folks, that industry is in NYC or LA, but the drinking here is good, and I often feel like i'm a part of tribe, like being fom Philly is like being in this tribe and if I go to LA and meet someone from Philly we smell each other's butts like we're dogs then go chase after squirrels together.

L and F: Can you explain what "drizhollering" is and would you call us the next day?
PL: Drizhollering: being so drunk that you try to get a girl/boy's phone number while they're standing right next to their BF or GF. Drizhollering: Waking up in someone else's bed and praying to god that you can escape their bed without waking them up and subsequently escaping their home without alerting their roomates, then you'll stop drizhollering. Drizhollering: Crying in the tub.

The Question We Always Ask:

L and F: When you guys get super big, will you become media whores driving around all drunk and showing your privates like some celebrities we know?
PL: Hells yes! Jonthousand actually has 2 penises. Wait until the paparazzi gets a flick of that shit! His second dill is green too! Peaaaaaaace!

Check them out here or here and buy the CD not only because its awesome but its important to support independent hip hop

Trend and Anti-trend of the Week

Trend: True Hip Hop Heads Shirts

I love Biggie Smalls and I love the Bedazzler. To my astonishment, I found both in the form of a bedazzled Notorious B.I.G. shirt and it was $15!!!!!!! Ok, so it wasn’t actually gem laden by hand because that would have taken a long ass time (I mean look at his glorious fat head). This stretchy, soft, white tee cradles his crowned dome like a mother would a fresh, sleeping baby. I can keep Christopher Wallace close to my heart when I go clubbin’ and its like he’s holding my hair back when I vomit (or was that the dark, massive security guard holding me against the ground as I puked and resisted at the same time?) We may never know, but I do know this…it goes perfect with my new tassled, metallic purse I got for $2 at a yard sale.

Anti-trend: The Boob Tube

No, I am not talking about that piece of fabric sewn in a cylinder that you wear around your rack as soon as winter breaks. I am talking about the damn Television! I am so serious when I say that life is more fulfilling if you do not have TV. Let me clarify…I have a TV, but I do not have any channels. So, I still indulge in a bi-monthly boot-leg movie and a quarterly super low budget
porn… but that is it. When people are talking about these ridiculous plots and mindless game shows, they turn to me for input. To their horror, I do not watch TV and cannot relate. I am treated like I have an illness and thinking it could possibly be contagious, they excuse themselves and stand me up for drinks later. I am not even one of those people that acts like TV is corrupting the minds of the youth and making girls anorexic because I don’t care. I’m just sayin’ you can so much shit done if you turn off your cable. Plus, go cold turkey and don’t even get Rabbit Ears. This doesn’t mean watch more You Tube. It means get out, enjoy your life, get a hobby, and make your own drama. Oh, and subscribe to Adbusters because they are anti-tv and anti-capitalism and everything else that makes for hot, bad-boy journalists.

Lady Chavez

Dear Lady Chavez,

Ok, somebody tried to stump me this week and instead of sending this one straight to the recycle bin, I thought I'd give it a whirl.

Dear Lady Chavez,

When African Bushman hunt big game with poison blow-darts - why aren't they poisoned when they eat their kill?

Sleepless in Serengeti

Dear Sleepless,

I am embarrassed to say that I did not know a lot about this subject. You all know I am the authority on everything that is a need to know and unfortunately all I knew about poisoned darts, I learned from Ace Ventura 2. Well, this week I took it upon myself to do some research and this is what I discovered:

These African men are actually briefly poisoned and it shuts down some of their vital organs temporarily. When the toxic substance trickles down to the man bush, his dodger dog fights it off like a girthy, pulsating light saber ridding the body of any foreign substance. I was going to cite my references here but I already returned that reputable stack of library books I plagiarized.

Love, Lady Chavez

Craft of The Week

Ok, I know school already started but you need a good semester to finish this anyway. Homegirl made rhinestone cases for her lunch! She basically made molds of these three menu items, out of styrene plastic and a shitload of rhinestones. After everything was in place, she spray painted them with chrome. She doesn't really have a site we can plug so just make your own immediately and check out Craftster for more great craft ideas.

Jena 6 Hip Hop CD Compilation

I met Daniel AKA Motown Pride on Rawkus a while ago. He specializes in spoken word and he's damn good. Since Jena 6 made the news, he has already created a CD featuring his underground hip hop connections and is coordinating a tour with the artists involved. Here is an excerpt from his Myspace about the project:

What's Next

We are not done yet folks.

Like I've mentioned to many, the Six are not free and unequal justice in our court system is a real phenomenon that still exists in abundance through

out this country. It is not just a race issue it is a monetary issue where the poor and disenfranchised do not get a fair shake. That's something that should disturb all of us. We will continue to fight. Many of the artists on the Justice 4 The Jena 6 CD will be performing in colleges around the Tampa Bay area and most likely abroad to continue to educate and raise money for those who are need. Contact me if you'd like us to perform at your school.

The CD can still be purchased/downloaded online (see below) in its entirey for $10 or for .99 per track. The host of the sales "widget" sends a direct check to the Jena Six Defense Fund. Its the best way to contribute as the 6 young boys get help and you receive one of the best CD compilations of the year.

When equality is compromised in this country, it effects the livelihood of ourselves and our children!

Be Blessed.

- Daniel aka Motown Pride

Click here for his Myspace and more info on the CD and how to get involved

Yours Truly,

Lady Chavez

Hillbilly Harlot Hearts Philly

So.. I was feeling bored..and I wanted to feel cool. I went to see Paris, je t'aime at the Ritz. I swear I waited at the trolley stop for over 20 mins. I wanted to grab some beer before the movie but since the trolley and the EL took for fuckin ever..I had to book it to the theatre.

Paris, je t'aime is 18 short films all ranging between 3-8 minutes. I have to say, I really enjoyed it. I was all by myself, armed with a small popcorn and a sprite and I just absorbed what was happening on the screen.

So many stories. A few I could do without. The Cohen brothers short was excellent, it describes the American love affair with Paris and how it never lives up to it's expectations ( I wouldnt know). Just so many shorts, most in subtitles (so you know I was feeling extra 'alternative'...) I do recommend a viewing. Really, I do. This is actually something I would buy.

After the movie, I walked from 4th and Chestnut to Ludwigs at 13th and Sansom. It was tooo crowded so I continued my walk down Sansom, I passed some Jazz bar that I wish I would have popped into but I walked down to McGlinchys. I went there because it's a cheap night..I drank three beers (all by myself) and I realized... it's not so scary to have a night by yourself. You may feel weird at first, like a loser, but it's okay. It was 'liberating' I guess.

I'm not afraid to go to a bar by myself (something I have never done) anymore. I took the bus from 15th and Walnut to 47th and Spruce and I was just fine. even popped in Dahlak for one final beer and stopped at the late night chinese place for an eggroll.

Nobody really spoke to me the entire night and I was fine with that for once. I got to soak in this city we chose to live in..see it all by myself. It reminded why I moved here in the first place and why I cant return to where I am from.

Life is decent given all the shit piled upon.

-Hillbilly Harlot

In Defense of Vegetarianism

We all know that vegetarianism or veganism can be expensive if you do it right (not eat mushroom Ramen everyday like me). Lower income communities usually are not able to fit the bill that comes with this lifestyle. So, this awesome group Food Not Bombs is in every major city basically using their own money to feed the homeless nutritious vegan meals. Find the group in your area and please volunteer because its one of the most punk things you can do right now.